Wearing Masks, Yet Still My True Self

Into The Japanese Mind  by Sio

In Osaka’s meetups, I often see familiar faces, but few become friends. One day, a Japanese girl ran over like an old friend: “So happy to see you! Let’s go karaoke after!” Her sudden warmth surprised me, cos we barely talked before.

After the event, I approached her. She glanced briefly, as if we’d never met, then turned back, laughing with her friends.

I was stunned. How could she change so fast? Did she mistake me? Were both warmth and coldness just roles?

In Japan, people master tatemae and honne - polite surface vs true feelings - perfecting role-switching.

At work, smiles, bows and polite words are masks. After hours drinking, shouting and slamming tables release pressure. Day and night, two selves keep switching.

Perhaps the warmth of the Japanese girl wasn’t fake. The role existed only for that scene. The feeling only belonged to that moment. Once the scene changed, role ended, emotions faded. But switching too often, one might forget who they truly are.

Masks exist everywhere. We all shift between selves: parents, bosses, friends, partners. Who speaks to parents like to friends? Who tells bosses what they truly think? Japan simply perfects it.

Masks aren’t lies, but daily social compromises. Each scene needs a different version of us. If well balanced, behind every mask remains an authentic self.

Sio

Resetting life in Osaka after years in the UK, France, Spain, Canada & Argentina. Seeing people and cultures from many sides.

Follow @anotherlifeclub and restart Another Life with me.